Sunday, April 01, 2007

Sunday Morning: Coffee & The New York Times

Somehow, this one caught my eye:
Apparently, there's a yearly lesbian retreat in California called The Dinah. Okay.....

And then there's the piece where I had to check the by-line to make sure I wasn't the author, I could have been:

Alena Tugend (not me) writes:

RECENTLY I’ve found myself annoyed by how busy my friends seem. Putting aside the possibility that they are avoiding me, some are so on the go that they barely have time to tell me they do not have time to talk. Every phone call, no matter how short, seems to be interrupted by several others. That is, of course, if I actually get a live person on the other end of the phone.
I consider my life to be somewhat filled and fulfilling. I have a husband and two children, work part time, volunteer, exercise several times a week (well, usually) and socialize regularly. For the record, I do not have a baby sitter, but do have a house cleaner for about four hours every two weeks.
But, and I am almost embarrassed to admit this, I also have time to read novels, catch a movie or play once in a while and have the occasional long lunch with a friend.
In our busy, busy world, however, I sometimes feel as if I am the odd one out.
Although those who are overworked and overwhelmed complain ceaselessly, it is
often with an undertone of boastfulness; the hidden message is that I’m so busy
because I’m so important.

She goes on to talk about people are too leashed to their blackberry/cellphone/Ipod/email lives. The thing is, I'm just as guilty as all of them, and I still have time for movies, novels, lunches, and the one that makes everyone lift their eyebrows and say "You have too much free time" : A blog. I just don't get it when my friends, even the stay at home moms, don't have time to return phone calls...

And then there's the review of Jerome Groopman's book: Where Does It Hurt? which reads:

"This elegant, tough-minded book recounts stories about how doctors and patients interact with one other. In the hands of Jerome Groopman, professor of medicine at Harvard and a staff writer for The New Yorker, these clinical episodes make absorbing reading and are often deeply affecting. "

Happy April Fool's Day, I'm back to coffee and the paper, and we're making a podcast this afternoon Roy, no cookie dough, but I have chocolate chips for you. Clink, why do I always have trouble formatting my block quotes?


ClinkShrink said...

There ya go, you're formatted.

I came very close to sending you that link except you always return my calls so it didn't really seem to apply.

Anonymous said...

"even the stay at home moms"
Obviously, they could not take the time away from lounging around eating bonbons. Or...maybe they just don't care for you as much as you thought they did.

DrivingMissMolly said...

Cute! Roy can have cookie dough if he wants too. It's cute!


jcat said...

Hey anon? Even in blogland, where you're pretty anonymous anyway..
there always has to be some asshole who tries to ruin it.That was totally below the belt and uncalled for.

Let me're a stay at home mom, not by choice, but because the working world breathed a sigh of relief at the thought that there was a reason apart from 'you're a dickhead' why they didn't have to employ you. And that you've been trying desperately to get a job ever since, and funnily enough, your charming personality just seems to stand in your way?

Most blogs are moving towards the 'at least have a blogger-ID', even if that is also virtually anonymous. Idiots like you are likely to push it towards having to use a real name.....

Anonymous said...

Sorry, jcat. Quite employed.

Anonymous said...

Clink: I always return my calls. Almost always the same day, sometimes the next.

Anonymous: "Even the stay at home moms." Oops. Hard to be tactful 24/7, but I'll keep trying. If it helps, I take a day a week to "work at home," meaning to write, but it's also the day I schedule repair folks, doctors, school obligations, exercise, do laundry, etc, and when I'm between projects, I don't even write. Needless to say, my busiest, most hectic day of the week. And yes, it's occured to me that life is a matter of ordering priorities, and that the friends who don't call back don't care for me as much as I'd thought, or like-- the message is "I'm too busy for you," and sometimes this hurts. It bothers me to the extent that I limit my close friendships to people who do call back. I have one friend who is a disorganized mess, is late to everything, doesn't call anyone back, and I've decided that she is otherwise such a wonderful person, that I take her on her terms. When she does call, it's to invite us for holiday meals, so I don't have to feel scorned. Not as easy as my other friendships. Clink returns her calls, Roy returns his emails (hmmm, I don't think I've ever left him a message, when I call, he picks up). Both Camel and the Judge are always there for me, abf writes everyday.

None of my other friends have blogs or spend their time writing unpublished novels; it is this funny sense that everyone in the world is busier.

Please, please, send bon bons.

PS to ClinkShrink: Thank you again for all the work you did on my computer today. I'm sorry the pasta was dry.

ClinkShrink said...

Wow, I no sooner get home from your house and here we both are on the blog. Is this a sad life or what??

Your food is always good. Someday you will see me by the roadside holding a sign that says "Will do tech support for food. I can't cook!".

NeoNurseChic said...

I hope the people close to me have come to realize that it's not that I don't care - but I'm also an absentminded, often distracted, very unorganized person who never manages to send cards on time (or at all in some cases), email people back (I usually get around to it eventually!), or call people back. And I show up late all the time. I hate to talk on the phone actually, but that's not why I don't call people back. I am just one of those people where my family and friends have to trust that I love them, even if I don't live my life by their rules. haha I think my mom is gradually getting used to it - she doesn't give me as much of a hard time anymore about being late. She used to get all worked up and say things like, "I wish you would get this together!" I think people know I care - even if my way of showing it would ordinarily be interpreted as rude or uncaring. It's just how I am...and I have such a struggle with my own health stuff that it's hard for me to even care about myself...let alone do it right when it comes to others.

I try.......

Take care,
Carrie :)

DrivingMissMolly said...

The only reason I have a BF is because she calls me and seeks me out. As a matter of fact, I should be calling her because she has finally finished law school and is waiting on bar results quite tensely.

I do love and care for her and have the best of intentions, though.

All she has to do is call and I will be at a funeral, at her house, etc.


JCAT--- You rule!!!

Dinah, I hope you are feeling better!

All of you, have a good week!

Midwife with a Knife said...

jcat: go, you! Just don't feed the trolls. ;)

About the too busy thing... I don't know, I don't always have time to talk to people, but I usually get back to them, even if I sometimes return phone calls with emails (because it's too late at night to call). But I'm not the best at keeping in touch. I can get pretty absorbed in work when I have a deadline or a big research project or something.

DrivingMissMolly said...


You're going to get several lashes with Dinah's dry pasta for your use of profanity! ; )


jcat said...

Apologies for the profanities...
just don't like it when people without even the guts to use a name are gratuitously nasty.
Disagree on content, yeah. But don't attack the blogger in such a particularly unpleasant way.

So anon. You say you are employed. I can think of a couple of jobs that would suit you - the IRS or those really aggro credit chasers. Or wow....a 3rd party lawyer, where you get to pursue ambulances and shove binding agreements into people's hands as they bleed....
So many nasty many anonymous people to do them...!

Anonymous said...

jcat-thanks for giving me some really good belly laughs! One of my bf's is an gyn/ob and she still calls and texts in between deliveries. She also is a single Mom with two daughter's. So.....I love her. I am not as good as she is, but I am learning.
Anonymous--I have noticed on my Forum or my friend's blogs that those that do not post a name are usually hiding behind their fears and need to be the "center of attention" or less they will have to face their fear. It's Ok--one of my favorite guys used to be ANON. Ends up he just has a really dry wit and was petrified of the cancer he was diagnosed with. We call him affectionately the "One who does not play well with Other's."

Anonymous said...

I came to this blog by searching "best psychiatrist in NYC blog" hoping to find some patients blogging w suggestions.... well any suggestions from you guys?